How Energy Healing Changed My Life Forever
More than sixty five years ago I embarked on a journey that has led me to the place I am today. Little did I know that the challenges I faced would be crucial lessons that would help me along my spiritual path of self-awareness. All of our daily trials and tribulations appear in our lives to help us grow and mature. Each lesson we learn contributes to us becoming healthy – physically, mentally and emotionally. It is at that point of harmonious balance that we reach our ultimate goal of spiritual healing and maturity. This is why we are all here. Allow me to show you how energy healing can put you on the path to healing your body, mind and spirit.
The Journey Begins . . .
It is May 1966, just days away from my graduation from Lafayette High School in Brooklyn, New York. I have been looking forward to this day for years. I am graduating with honors and receiving the Mayor’s Award. I am picturing my grandma Jenny sitting in the audience. I can imagine the pride on her face as I stand up when my name is called to receive this award. I am so excited; I can barely wait for my graduation day. I plan to get a job right after and buy her anything she wants. I love my grandma with all my heart.
And then, I receive the worst news of my young life. At 2 o’clock in the morning, our family receives a phone call telling us that Grandma Jenny had died. How could this be? She was only sixty-four. She was supposed to be alive to celebrate my most important day, and now she was gone. The news broke my heart; I felt so angry with God. Why did He take this woman who loved me so much? She was so understanding, giving, loving and a healer. Why did He take her before my important day? My time with her was just beginning. I felt that this was so unfair, and the more I wept for her, the more I lost my faith and trust in God.
When graduation day came, my mom insisted that I attend, which I did. I received my award. Without my grandma’s smiling face there to cheer for me, the award and the ceremony wasn’t special anymore. A week later I began my new job at Blue Cross/Blue Shield selling insurance, but I was having trouble getting over the death of my grandma. Tears and sadness were a common experience for me.
About two weeks later, I was alone at home when I heard my name being called. I thought this was just my imagination, however, my grandma always called me “Babasita,” and that’s what I was hearing. I got up from the chair and began walking to the foyer. There, I saw a white cloud, and from within I could hear my name being softly called, “Babasita.” I said, “Grandma, Grandma, is that you?” And she replied, “Yes Babasita everything is ok. Don’t be so angry, Babasita.” The closer I got to the cloud, the clearer I could see her. I became frightened and ran to the phone to call my mother, who was visiting her brother. Over the phone, my mom told me I was hearing Grandma’s voice because I missed her so much. She wanted me to believe that it was only my imagination. I was supposed to believe that my grief had created this entire episode. My mom and I did not speak about this experience anymore, or any other experiences and I did not hear from my grandma again for many years.
A New Beginning and a Promise . . .
My life went on. I moved on from selling insurance to working at Roosevelt Hospital handling their employee benefits. The next few years brought marriage to my wonderful husband Harold and the birth of our two beautiful children, John and Sandra. I was able to keep a promise I had made to Grandma Jenny with the birth of our son. Her son had died during World War II, and I knew she missed him terribly. During my childhood, we would talk often about him. I had promised her that if I had a son, I would name him after hers, which I lovingly did, and so our first-born was named John. The ironic thing was my grandma’s son’s name was John Salti and our son is John Savin.
As our children began day care, I decided to go back to work part-time. My first interview was for General Nutrition Center and I was hired to sell vitamin/mineral supplements, something that I knew a lot about. I had always been attracted to natural healing methods and felt that I had intuitive abilities. I should mention here that my Grandma Jenny did energy clearing on my sister and me for many years. We did not know what she was doing, and of course, we thought it strange that we were never sick. Many times we would beg her not to do healing on us so we could get sick and stay home from school.
I had a strong desire to help people heal but was not sure how to go about it so the vitamin business looked like a wonderful way to help. I worked in that field for the next ten years, climbing up the business ladder to a successful position as Regional Sales Director. I worked for General Nutrition Centers for almost twelve years, and won Regional Sales Director of the Year awards for three consecutive years in a row. I had a very difficult area to supervise; Brooklyn, Queens, Long Island, and Staten Island. But being from Coney Island and growing up in the projects offered me the street smarts I needed to keep afloat and strong. Caring for my employees was one of my main goals. I’ve always felt that a good sales person is one with knowledge, so I wrote many company newsletters offering tips on supplements to keep my sales associates and managers knowledgeable and informed. As a supervisor I worked fifty plus hours at work, and many more hours at home taking care of our family. I was “super mom” – able to do anything, anytime, anywhere, all the time. Then it happened. Stress took its toll.
My Death . . .
One evening while sleeping, I experienced my own death. I saw myself walking through a tunnel filled with bright white light. To my amazement, my deceased relatives were there to greet me along the way. Meeting them like this was so exciting. I was feeling so much love from everyone. I also felt a strange calm and peace inside. I experienced a serenity I hadn’t felt for many years. At the end of the tunnel I saw my grandma, Jenny, smiling and putting out her hand for mine. I kept saying, “Grandma, Grandma, I can’t believe you are here, Grandma.” I was just about to touch her hand, when she looked at me and screamed, “No, no, not yet;” then she pushed me backwards.
I woke up gasping for air. My body was freezing. I woke my husband, shaking him, sobbing: “Harold, I died. I just died! And my grandma sent me back.” It was at that moment, I knew that God was giving me a second chance. I had to stop being so angry with God, and I had to begin to respect and love myself. At that moment as I was trying to so hard not to be angry at God, but I still couldn’t understand why He chooses to take people at such an early age.
After my death experience, I began to take a deeper look at my life and decided to quit my job as a Regional Sales Director and purchase a franchise GNC store to eliminate some of the stress. What was I thinking? Did I think that by buying a franchise store this would eliminate stress and get me on my path? My head was still not turned in the right direction. After owning a GNC store for three years and struggling financially, I went out of business. I had no job, and felt like a true failure.
I can remember sitting on the steps at our house in Staten Island, not knowing which direction to move my life, when my daughter Sandra came over to me. She could see the frustration, disappointment and sadness in my eyes. She had a part-time job and had saved some money. She looked at me and said, “Mom I know this is not much, but I want you to have this and pay some bills.” She handed me an envelope with $500.00 in it. I did not want to take it but she insisted and I remembering crying and hugging her. It was at that moment that I truly understood the meaning of giving of oneself unconditionally and without expecting anything in return. But little did I know it was also God’s way of presenting me with a choice to change my life again. Did I listen? No . . . I kept on creating more stress and uncertainty in my life. I was following my passion – or so I thought.
Another Wrong Path Leads to the Right One . . .
So I decided to start my own vitamin business selling supplements to chiropractors and their patients. It was at that time, through a mutual friend, Barbra Okada, that I was introduced to Linda Mackenzie. Linda lived in California and periodically came to Staten Island, New York to visit her family. We spoke about my vitamin business, and she told me about meditation tapes she had produced on various topics.
Linda was a clinical hypnotherapist, a radio talk show host, and an author of several books. I found her interesting, but didn’t really click with her personality. I thought when she returned to California we would never speak again. Before she left, she reached into her bag and gave me one of her books titled Inner Insights. She autographed it, and I thanked her. We exchanged phone numbers and went on our merry way. I went home, looked at the book and thought it was strange. The book described healing colors, crystals, gemstones, fortune tell ing, auras, Chakras, Native American animal spirit information, numerology, reflexology, etc. It was not my kind of book, but I kept it and tucked it away with my other books.
Little did I know that Linda’s mission was to gently guide me back to God and back to spirituality? My life was about to drastically change. My vitamin business was doing reasonably well. However, I was feeling very unhappy and had started creating too much stress in my life again. It was January of 1998 and the last year of being in my forties, when I realized I was falling apart. Nothing in my life was working out the way I imagined it should. My parents moved to Florida, my daughter Sandra and her husband Lenny moved to California, my son John and his wife Terri lived in Arizona and my husband Harold was consistently working overtime. I found myself alone most of the time. I didn’t know what to do or who to turn to. I was always tired. The arthritis in my body was getting worse, and my chronic fatigue was acting up. My migraine headaches were raging again, and I was gaining weight. I felt lonely and very frustrated with my life.
However, I’ve always known that frustration eventually brings change. Although some lessons from change can be very difficult to handle and understand, I have always welcomed it because change brings growth. Within the next few months, Linda and I began to merge companies. It was September of 1998 when I turned fifty. That year Linda and I became very close and I knew we would be the best of friends forever. As time went on, she helped me believe in God again. Linda did spiritual energy healing on me and always helped me to understand the emotional and mental issues I was experiencing. Linda helped me realize that of all the different emotions in the world, love was the most potent. She taught me that loving and trusting God overshadowed all other emotions which helped me to begin healing on all levels. I learned to love and forgive those who hurt me. I forgave my Grandma Jenny for dying, I forgave GOD for taking her and I realized that love and forgiveness were the greatest gifts one could give and receive.
When I turned fifty, I felt the need to do something dramatic; so I changed my long black hair to short and blonde. I loved how I looked and felt. From that moment on I began my transformation, and figured that by changing the way I looked I would become a different person. I looked different but was still unable to truly feel different. My body pain was increasingly becoming worse.
My Introduction to Reiki Healing . . .
One day my niece Stefanie, out of the clear blue sky, asked me to take her to a metaphysical store. While we were there shopping, Stefanie happened to see a flyer mentioning a Reiki healing circle. Neither of us knew what Reiki was, but since we were both in poor shape physically, we decided to go to the healing circle in Staten Island, NY. When we got to the Reiki healing circle, the atmosphere was wonderful. Everyone sang songs of love, and it was so calm and peaceful. The Reiki practitioners did Reiki on us and the feeling was like no other I had ever experienced. I sat and cried, yet didn’t quite understand why I was crying. I instantly knew I had to learn how to do this.
From that moment on, I knew that energy healing had to become part of my life. I knew it was what I really needed to do. It also brought me back to the times when my grandma would do energy clearing on my sister and I, and it felt very natural to me. For the first time I understood the need to help myself heal from within, and I began to seek my new beginning. On September 18, 2000, I became a Reiki I practitioner. I experienced an unbelievable roller coaster ride from the cleansing period, but I still remained focused and did my healing at least twice a day for a month. I could feel changes even though my body pain had gotten worse. I hated and loved myself at the same time. I was going through menopause and my mood swings were unbearable both to others and me. Strangely, I felt more love in my heart but was unable to show it and realized I was still very judgmental and moody toward those around me. Also, I had thought I forgave my grandma for dying but realized I hadn’t and knew I truly needed to work on that part of myself.
Most importantly, I had to forgive and begin loving myself for who I am. I also knew in my heart that I was a healer but found it difficult to express that to others. I should mention that as a child my grandma would always look at me and say “Shush . . . don’t let anyone know because they will put us away in a crazy hospital”. I was always afraid that people would think I was crazy – even though I knew I had intuitive abilities and was able to feel people’s energies and I often saw or sensed spirits. My body was crying out for healing and for me to allow my passion and purpose to come forward, but I was unable to completely see it. This was not an easy task and I will say that it did not happen overnight. It took time and patience. I realized that once I was able to let go of my issues and work from the inside out, asking my soul what needed to be healed, I would be set free.
First Healing Miracle . . .
Giving myself healing treatments helped me realize that the pain I was experiencing was from emotional and spiritual challenges. Then a miracle happened to me. One morning while looking in the mirror and speaking to myself, I had asked God for help. I was experiencing black particles floating in front of my eyes which made it hard to see. I asked God to help me understand what was happening, and to please make the black particles go away. Suddenly I heard a voice within me say, “All you need to do is ask.” The black particles stopped floating and disappeared instantly. At that very moment, I realized God does listen and speak to us, but we often choose not to hear. He sees and understands us, but we often choose not to see nor understand. He loves us unconditionally, but we often choose to love with conditions.
Within months, my body was pain free and my chronic fatigue was a thing of the past. No more headaches, no more knee pain and I lost 10 pounds. My eyesight went from -450 in both eyes to -200. I felt human again but felt something I had not experienced in the past. I was able to love and be happy with myself. From that moment on, my true thirst for knowledge to help myself heal began and my relationship with God dramatically improved.
I could feel myself growing calmer and more relaxed. I was able to focus on my inner world of thoughts and feelings. I was enjoying the positive changes in my life and was able to see and understand the areas of my life I wanted and needed to improve. I began to appreciate the wonderful things I had at home and at work. I was beginning to understand and feel the subtle energies that were all around me. Instead of allowing negative energies to affect me, I surrounded them and myself with God’s loving energy and light. I began to understand that I should not let other people’s issues become mine. I began my journey of mindfulness.
When I gave or received healing, I was now experiencing a sense of complete peacefulness. My inner being felt centered and balanced filled with God’s white light. I felt a oneness with everything in existence – people, birds, bugs, animals, grass, trees, air, ocean, sky, and the universe. I felt love in my heart for all creation including myself. I was filled with the desire to share that feeling with others and knew that if I touched just one person with the loving energy of God, I would have made a difference in the world.
My Reiki teachers were the most caring and loving individuals. Margaret Case of Loving Touch Center taught me Reiki Levels I and II and more about love. Actually, I was not thinking of becoming a Reiki Master until I met a very special person, Yiebah. I sensed in her the meaning of being able to truly see. What made her even more unique was that she was blind, yet was able to see more than most that had their sight. She had a sense of vision that gave me new insight into using my intuition, and she trained me to become an Advanced Practitioner of Reiki. Lizette Fernandez (rest in peace) was my Reiki Master/Teacher. She understood all about giving freely of yourself by volunteering and being non-judgmental. I felt a strong spiritual connection between us. Because of Lizette, I grew to understand, at a deeper level, what unconditional giving and loving meant.
More Changes and a Deep Loss . . .
In December of 2000 as I continued on my spiritual healing journey, my son, John, was going through a major change in his life. He phoned to tell me that he and his wife were moving back to Staten Island. My husband flew to Arizona to help them pack their home, while I looked for an apartment for them. I could sense he wasn’t telling me everything, but I did not want to intrude on their privacy. About a month later, it came out; he told me he was getting a divorce.
Because of my healing ability, I was able to remain calm and non-judgmental about their situation and helped both of them the best I could. His wife decided to move back with her parents, while John stayed in Staten Island to begin a new life for himself. He began studying to become a stockbroker, and got a job as a financial consultant. He worked in downtown Manhattan in the Century 21 building across the street from the World Trade Center. His confidence level was returning. He and my husband, on occasion, would travel together since they now worked across the street from one another.
Family emotions were beginning to calm down, and I began to feel more at peace again. Then, on April 1, 2001, my best friend, Joan Lombardi, who had been battling breast cancer for many years, found out at the age of 40 that the cancer had metastasized to the brain. In the past I had experienced the devastation of losing a loved one, but this time it was different.
Each day when I went to the hospital to visit I did energy healing on Joan. I knew that my loving touch was helping her to cope with the fact that she was dying. I also knew that the energy healing was balancing her body so when the time did come, she would pass on peacefully. As I did energy healing on her, I could see that her eyes were telling me, “Thank you for the love.”
On the evening of April 25, I told my husband that I felt Joan was going to make her transition the next day. The next morning Joan passed on. While caught in heavy traffic on the way to the hospital, I felt the presence of intense light and angels in my car. Oddly, this experience left me feeling calm, even in Manhattan traffic. I knew my best friend had died. I finally got to the hospital and ran upstairs. I opened the door to her room and there were her mother, sister, husband and three-year-old daughter crying. Joan left her body on April 26, 2001 at 10 am, the same time the angels came to me in my car. The human side of me wept like a baby, but the spiritual side understood that she was free of pain and at peace, home with God.
More Upheaval and a Step in the Right Direction . . .
During my son’s divorce and my best friend’s illness and death, I was struggling emotionally and financially to keep my vitamin business alive. A month later my company went out of business. Without energy healing I would have had a nervous breakdown; but I was able to see the situation calmly, and I knew that I had a new path to follow.
I began my quest to help others by broadening my knowledge to learn Pranic healing and hypnosis, while teaching energy healing and volunteering at various health centers. I provided natural healing for self-empowerment at Island Women’s Medical Center with Dr. Harriet (Leia) Stathakos, Dr. Lucia Colletti, & psychologist Janice Earl. I taught healing classes at Panacea, an Integrative Treatment Center. I volunteered energy healing and hypnotherapy with individual sessions for patients at the Staten Island AIDS Task Force, Richard Bailey Seton Hospital AIDS Division, St. Vincent’s Catholic Medical Hospital, and Mt. Manressa Wellness Retreat. I did Reiki seminars at La Tourette Golf Course, Dolphin and Nautilus Gyms, Relax on Cloud Nine Wellness Spa, the Hilton Hotel, the Rotary Club, Professional Business Women’s Clubs, and St. Peter’s Catholic High School. I wanted to let the world know we can help ourselves heal with Divine energy. Though these activities did not offer financial compensation, I knew in my heart that the time would come that it would and kept on volunteering.
Disaster Strikes Close to Home . . .
Then on September 11, 2001 at 8:55 in the morning I received a call from one of my husband’s fellow workers asking me if Harold went to work. I answered, “Of course he did, why are you asking?” She then asked me if I heard what happened, and I said, “No, what happened?” She told me a plane had crashed into the World Trade Center. I slammed down the phone and raced to put the television on. I sat on the floor sobbing with the phone in my hand, trying to reach my husband and son. I was unable to get a dial tone to make a call, but quickly realized that I could receive calls. Frantic calls from the family started to flood our home. My daughter in California was panicked and asked if I had heard from John or her dad. I told her I couldn’t give her any information because I didn’t know where they were. Then my sister and parents from Florida called, Linda called from California, and the calls went on and on.
I was feeling more anxiety and panic as I watched the television news reports in horror, witnessing the second plane hitting and then the collapse of both buildings. I remember opening the sliding door in our bedroom and screaming outside asking God, “Why is this happening?” and repeating the same words over and over again, sobbing for everyone that was involved, not just for my son and husband. I began to feel bodies burning and helplessness and my anxiety was getting worse. I was feeling things I have never experienced before.
Then I felt God saying to me that my husband and son were fine. All of a sudden I was able to sense that they were okay, but I was unable to trust that feeling. It was now 10:30am and I still hadn’t heard from them. Then Linda called me again making another effort to calm me and told me to feel for their energies. All of a sudden, I was able to feel my husband. As I closed my eyes, I was actually able to see him walking. But when I tried to feel my son’s energies, I was unable to and my panic flared. Linda reassured me that she could feel my son, and that he was alive. She told me that they both would call very soon.
Then a miracle happened. At 11am, my husband phoned. The first thing he asked was if I had heard from John. I could hear the pain in his voice when I said no. I sobbed, grateful to God that he was alive. He explained to me when the first plane hit the Trade Center, everyone had been told to go uptown to the other Verizon buildings. However, he volunteered to stay back to help setup a command post for the police and fire personnel. He explained that no one knew what was happening when the World Trade Tower collapsed, and he thought he was going to die because his building was shaking and had been severely damaged. He said when he finally got out of the building and saw what had happened, he was shocked. He walked uptown to another Verizon office and tried to call John. He gave me an address where he was and said i f I heard from John, have him meet him there and they would both try to get back home.
Then another miracle; at 11:15 my son’s ex-wife Teri called and told me she had spoken to John. She said he had tried to call me but the lines were out. He was able to reach her and asked her to call me. I cannot explain in words how I felt knowing both of them were alive. I gave Teri the address where Harold was and asked her to give it to John if they spoke again.
Then at 4:00pm, Harold called me and put John on the phone. Need I say more? At 11pm I patiently waited for them to get off a bus from Brooklyn. As they did, I ran and kissed and hugged them, thanking God over and over for giving them both back to me. The three of us were overcome with tears of happiness and extreme sadness.
My husband went back to work within the next week, helping to repair the phone lines for the Stock Exchange and was on special assignment for the next few months. I began doing healing on John and felt a heaviness and sadness in his heart. Like thousands of people, my heart was also very saddened. I felt the need to volunteer at the Staten Island Homeport, offering energy healing to the firefighters, army, police, etc.
In October, my son’s company transferred him uptown to the IBM building on the 34 floor. The building he originally worked at had been severely damaged. He found it difficult to work in New York and on such a high floor. Unable to cope, he quit his job and in January 2002 moved to Florida. Many of his fellow workers were unable to cope and many of them began moving to Florida. A few months had passed and John was living with my nephew Paul and his wife Rebecca. He was working at Paul’s car wash . . . washing cars. Then a magical moment for John . . . with so many of his co-workers moving away from New York and to Florida, the company he worked for decided to open an office in Florida. John was offered his job back in the Boca Raton office. He was so excited. I can recall our conversation the first day he went back to work. He called and said, “Mom, the building is great,” and I replied, “What floor are you on?” John said, “The 2 floor and there are only 4 floors total!” My heart felt relieved for him.
More Family Changes and an Important Lesson . . .
While all this was going on in my life, my father was taking care of my mother who was totally dependent on him for her care. She had Parkinson’s-like syndrome that basically produced the same effects of difficulty with muscle movements and stiffness. Eventually, she was not able to walk. Eating became difficult, and I had made the decision to have a feeding tube put in her stomach to keep her alive. On occasion a problem would develop with the feeding tube and my mother had to have a visiting nurse. Her name was Joan Mazzeo-Little. When I came to visit my mom, I met Joan and we instantly became friends and found we shared a mutual interest in alternative therapies. My mother recovered from that episode, but later in 2001 had to have home health services again for the same reason. Once again, Joan was her nurse. Joan and I got to spend time together exchanging information in various healing modalities. We spoke about working together, but I was still living in New York at the time. Then in April of 2002, my father had a heart attack and a triple by-pass operation. We now needed a full-time nurse for my mom and for my father. At the time, my father had a visiting nurse and yes, you guessed it, it was my friend Joan again.
After 9/11 I kept on telling my husband we really needed to move because I was unable to live in Staten Island. The energy had shifted and of course there was a lot of fear. I was also traveling back and forth to Florida helping my parents. In June 2002, my husband decided to retire after 32 years, and we moved to Florida to help my parents. We purchased a home large enough for my parents and us to live in. In my mind, I thought that now I would be able to do healing on them and that everything would be okay. Unfortunately, this was not the case.
Tension began to grow between my mother, father and me. My mom would not allow me to do healing on her and my dad thought I was a witch and weird. They were unable to understand the positive changes in me and kept asking for the old Barbara to come back. The negative energies were beginning to wear me down. I kept forgiving them for not understanding and would constantly surround them with love and light. Every time I would approach my mom and ask if I could do healing on her, she would tell me no. Many times I placed my hands on her and she would push them away. I began to realize a very important lesson. Everyone has the choice to heal. If they choose not to, that is their choice; you can’t take it personally. I was able to recognize that these were their issues, not mine, and I needed to let go of any hurt and forgive them.
An Exciting Venture and a Sad Goodbye . . .
Living in Florida, I was able to teach Joan and her husband Bill Reiki and Prana healing. Joan’s gift to me was adding valuable input to my book. Many of my students had asked me to write a book based on how I taught, and so I did. I began writing the book in Florida. Joan and I created Positive Holistic Approaches, Inc., an education and service company, offering continuing education courses for nurses and massage therapists. I was finally creating something I truly had passion for.
Then tragedy struck. My ten-year-old dog Sammy, who had never been sick, became ill. I called him my “Reiki Master” dog. Back in New York he would meditate with me and would sit in on my classes. Everyone loved Sammy. He had so much love in his heart and eagerly allowed me to do energy healing on him all the time.
On the morning before taking him to the veterinarian’s office, I felt a tumor in his stomach. During the initial exam, the doctor said nothing appeared to be wrong with him. I told the doctor that before coming here, I felt a tumor in his stomach, and I had done healing on him. The doctor took an x-ray and found that there was indeed a tumor. He immediately operated and removed it – a six-pound non-cancerous one. The doctor was amazed how large the tumor was and that Sammy showed no signs of being so sick. He allowed me to do energy healing on Sammy before and after his operation. His recovery time was cut in half, and the next day Sammy came home. However, Sammy stopped eating, and when I did energy healing on him, his energy was telling me he was dying. Sammy was also telling me that he needed to leave because we would be moving to California and a Rottweiler pet would make it difficult for us to get an apartment. I would say Sammy . . . we just moved to Florida, we are not going anywhere. During this time of Sammy’s recovery (or so I thought), my husband and I were sleeping on the couch in the living room to be with Sammy because he was unable to come upstairs to the bedroom.
Then on March 1, 2003 at 4:45 am, I suddenly awakened. I looked at Sammy and began to kiss him when he looked up to the sky, howled and died in my arms. My husband and I began doing CPR on him, but he was gone. We both cried uncontrollably and held him for about an hour. I asked God to watch over him and thanked him for the years he gave us with Sammy. My heart was so broken . . . and as I write this tears come rolling down my face. As time passed I missed Sammy so and would cry often. My friend Joan (the nurse) had given me a poem that helped my broken heart knowing that we would meet again and I have decided to include it. It is called “The Rainbow Bridge”:
There is a bridge connecting Heaven and Earth.
It is called the Rainbow Bridge because of its many colors.
Just this side of the Rainbow Bridge,
there is a land of meadows, hills, and valleys with lush green grass.
When a beloved pet dies, the pet goes to this place.
There is always food and water and warm spring weather.
The old and frail animals are young again.
They play all day with each other.
There is only one thing missing.
They are not with their special person who loved them on earth.
So each day they play until the day comes when one suddenly stops playing and looks up! The eyes are staring!
And this one suddenly runs from the group!
You have been seen, and when you and your special friend meet,
you take him or her in your arms and embrace.
Your face is kissed again and again and again, and you look once
more into the eyes of your trusting pet.
Then you cross the Rainbow Bridge together,
never again to be separated.
I knew Sammy would have wanted me to continue writing my book. With every page I wrote Sammy stayed at my feet and encouraged me to create. I need to mention here that I did have something very special to look forward to…
A Blessing and Yet another Setback . . .
Flash forward – to May 2003 and our daughter Sandra is expecting our first grandchild and I am waiting to purchase a flight ticket to California any day now. Her due date was around May 20. On May 3 my sister called and asked if Harold and I would like to go on a boat ride the next day. I said ok; however that morning I had a bad feeling about the outing, but still went.
We were out about fifteen minutes when the waters became choppy. All I remember is holding on for dear life as the boat went up in the air and came down very hard. I also came down really hard and lost my breath. My body felt as though my pelvic bones were broken. I was in excruciating pain and could barely move. I was carried off the boat and decided to go home against a consensus of opinion that I should go to the hospital.
However, I decided to see my nephew David who is a chiropractor in Miami. When I got to his office and saw the way he looked at me, I knew I was in trouble. After taking x-rays, I learned that the pain I was experiencing was an injury to the coccyx bone. He explained that this type of injury takes months to heal. He knew that Sandra was going to have a baby soon, and I wanted to be there. He looked at me and said I doubt if you will be able to go. I could hardly stand and sitting was unbearable and I was in intense pain.
I mentioned to David that I was going to do healing on myself. I went home and did just that – morning, noon and night. David contributed his chiropractic skills, and I worked my healing abilities for the next three weeks.
While I was treating myself, I also thanked God for the pain so I could appreciate being without the pain. I even thanked God for hurting me and not my family. I did not say, “Why me?” because I knew there was a lesson here. It was about listening – listening to my inner voice, which I hadn’t done. Thankfully, I was all better within four weeks. I had no more pain, and my coccyx injury completely healed. My daughter gave birth to our first granddaughter on May 16, 2003. My son John went in my place, but two weeks later I made it to California to see my beautiful Kyla. Amazing . . . isn’t it, the power of energy healing and the mind to heal itself.
Two More Blessings . . .
It was now the week before Thanksgiving of 2003 and I was in the mood for Chinese food. Our son was driving when all of a sudden he turned into a shopping center. I looked at him and said “what are you doing”? He said he saw a Chinese restaurant. We parked the car and a few stores before the restaurant was a pet shop and in the front was a whole bunch of dogs and cats for adoption. I looked down and these two adorable little puppies both looked at me. I said to Harold, my husband, lets walk away and he agreed.
But while I was eating, I kept seeing the two little puppies’ eyes, begging me to come back. I stopped eating my food and said I must walk to see the dogs again. As I got out of the restaurant, a big van was about to drive away. I stopped the driver and asked if she still had the two little puppies. She said she had had them for a while and they were not friendly and no one wants them. I asked if I could please see them. She was a little annoyed because she had already packed up all the dogs but she took out the little girl and the dog went crazy licking me and would not let me go. Then she took out her brother and he did the same . . . and when they saw my husband and John, the dogs went crazy licking and licking us.
The two of them came home with us and I could swear that one is Sammy and the other is Buddy, a dog we had a long time ago. I wanted to name them that but John told me to give them different names. We named the little girl Sandy, and the little boy Alex. Alex’s coloring is exactly like Sammy’s. The evening we took them home, it felt as if we had always had them . . . interesting . . . little puppies weighing only 10 pounds…
And the Journey Continues with More Changes . . .
Back at home, despite my continued efforts, my parents did not want to receive healing energy from me. My situation was growing worse. I was living with negativity day and night and I felt it was necessary for me to move on. The environment with my parents became increasingly difficult, and in February of 2004, my sister Janet decided to purchase our home.
My sister and her soon-to-be husband moved in and my parents were very happy living with her. I was able to accept the fact that my parents got along much better with my sister, and no matter what help I offered, they were not interested. I learned to forgive them, yet love them without judgment, thanks to energy healing. I want to mention here that every two months I was flying to California to see my granddaughter and with every trip it was becoming more and more difficult to leave.
As fate would have it, my husband and I were looking for another home in Florida, though I really wanted to move to California. We received a call one night from my daughter’s husband, Lenny, who told us that they realize the importance of family and asked if we had bought a home yet. I explained to him that we were still looking when he told me that my grandchildren need us. I said grandchildren? I have one granddaughter, Kyla. He told me, with a song in his voice, that my daughter was expecting her second child.
Within the next few days, I flew out to California and was looking for an apartment. I found one in Thousand Oaks, five minutes away from my daughter. Within two weeks my husband and I drove to California with our two new puppies and everything went smoothly. The only difficult thing was leaving my son behind in Florida, but I knew he was doing just fine and was very happy.
My granddaughter, Kyla, now knows her grandma and grandpa and I can’t wait for the next grandchild – due in September, and we just found out it is a grandson! I am blessed. My grandma Jenny, my mother and I were all born on the same day, September 3rd. Wouldn’t it be incredible if my grandson were born on the same day?
Lessons Learned . . .
I have now realized that my soul has opened up through all of these experiences. I also realize that holding onto issues only causes pain from within. Once you learn to let go, you are free and able to help yourself heal. The greatest unconditional love you can give someone or something is to let it go. Life is like a merry-go-round, constantly going round and round. Periodically we need to step off and step back to understand our lessons. We continually experience more changes, growth and lessons as we love unconditionally. It is a ride, constantly in motion and never ending.
Observing my life through my actions is what healing is all about – seeing, feeling and knowing that I can make the choice to change. Remember that there are no quick fixes and there will be times when you feel emotionally tossed up and down. Trust in yourself that you have made the best choice for you. The path to growth is a lifelong process.
Now my grandma comes to me and I am able to feel and listen to her presence. With tears in my eyes, I expressed my deep love for her and told her how much I miss her. I thank her for throwing me back to life because I now realize I have a mission to accomplish. I told her I now know that God needed her to help others, and that it was more important for her to be on the other side. I realized I was being selfish wanting to keep her here with me, but I was just expressing my feelings and being human. Then all of a sudden a whirlwind of love engulfed my entire body, and I could feel my grandma hugging me with the love I yearned for all these years.
This time it was different though; I was finally able to love myself, too.
There comes a time in your life when you finally become aware of what life is really about and the importance of non-material things. When love is all around you, you realize how wealthy you are. My being healthy and having a loving relationship with God, family and friends is the most important thing in the world. I thank God everyday for all that I am.
Wishing you love, light and wholeness,